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As grandmothers, we’ve had the privilege of watching families grow and change across generations. Some changes have been for the better—more open communication, increased opportunities for young people, and greater awareness of mental health. But along with these advancements, we’ve also seen certain values that once held families together fade into the background.
It’s not that the younger generation is deliberately ignoring these values, but rather that life today moves at such a fast pace that some of the most important principles get left behind. We see families spending less time together, children growing up without the same sense of responsibility, and a world where instant gratification is prioritized over patience and hard work.
As grandmothers, we hold the wisdom of years past. We know that some traditions and values are worth holding onto because they create stronger families, healthier relationships, and happier lives. Let’s take a closer look at some of the most neglected family values today and how we can bring them back into focus.
1. Respect for Elders
Respect for elders was once a given. Children were taught to listen when their grandparents or parents spoke, to greet elders properly, and to value the wisdom that comes with age. Today, respect is often seen as something that must be earned rather than automatically given. While there’s nothing wrong with expecting people to be kind and fair, the general attitude toward elders has changed.
Many young people today question authority in ways that previous generations did not. While a little healthy skepticism can be good, outright disregard for the experiences of older generations creates a divide between young and old.
We can remind our grandchildren of the value of respect by modeling it ourselves. We can show respect in the way we treat others, in how we listen to them, and in how we share our wisdom—not as lectures, but as gentle guidance.
2. Quality Family Time
Years ago, family time was sacred. Sitting together for meals, going on outings, and spending evenings in conversation were normal parts of daily life. Today, technology, busy schedules, and individual pursuits have made family time less of a priority.
It’s heartbreaking to see families where each member is lost in their own world—glued to a phone screen, busy with work, or overwhelmed with responsibilities. While these things are part of modern life, they shouldn’t come at the expense of meaningful connections.
As grandmothers, we can encourage family togetherness by creating opportunities for bonding. Hosting Sunday dinners, organizing family game nights, or simply sharing stories from our past can remind our loved ones of the importance of being present with one another.
3. Patience and Delayed Gratification
In today’s world, everything happens instantly. If we want food, we order it. If we need an answer, we Google it. If we want entertainment, it’s available at the push of a button.
While convenience is wonderful, it has also made patience a rare virtue. Many young people struggle with waiting, whether it’s for career success, personal achievements, or even small things like waiting for a meal to be prepared.
We can teach patience through small, everyday activities—gardening, baking, or even storytelling. When children see that good things take time, they learn to appreciate the process rather than just the result.
4. Commitment and Responsibility
The idea of sticking with something through thick and thin is becoming less common. Whether it’s in relationships, jobs, or responsibilities, people today are often quick to move on when things get difficult.
This is not to say that people should stay in toxic situations, but perseverance is an important trait. Marriage, careers, friendships—all require dedication and effort. When commitment is lacking, people miss out on the deep satisfaction that comes from working through challenges.
We can help bring back this value by sharing our own stories of perseverance. Whether it’s how we worked through tough times in our marriages, stayed dedicated to a job, or kept friendships alive for decades, these stories can serve as inspiration.
5. Humility and Gratitude
Social media has created a culture where people feel pressured to showcase only the best parts of their lives. This has led to a decline in humility, as many feel the need to present themselves as perfect.
At the same time, gratitude has also taken a hit. Instead of appreciating what they have, many young people focus on what they don’t have, constantly comparing themselves to others.
We can instill gratitude by practicing it ourselves. A simple habit of saying “thank you,” appreciating the little things, and reminding our grandkids of the blessings they have can go a long way.
6. Hard Work and Perseverance
Our generation understood that nothing worthwhile comes easy. We worked hard for what we had, and we didn’t expect instant results. Today, many young people struggle with resilience. If something is difficult, they may feel discouraged or assume it’s not meant for them.
Teaching the value of hard work doesn’t mean forcing our grandchildren to struggle, but it does mean showing them the rewards of perseverance. Whether it’s through hands-on activities like fixing something around the house or encouraging them to stick with a hobby, we can help build resilience.
7. Family Loyalty
Family is meant to be a safe place, but with increasing individualism, many young people are distancing themselves from family ties. While independence is important, there is great value in standing by family through thick and thin.
Encouraging open conversations, being a listening ear, and reminding our grandkids that family is forever can help bring back this value.
8. Faith and Moral Integrity
Faith, whether in religion or simply in moral principles, was once the foundation of many families. Today, as life gets busier, faith practices—whether it’s prayer, kindness, or reflection—are becoming less of a priority.
We can lead by example, not by forcing traditions but by living them in a way that inspires our grandchildren to seek their own spiritual grounding.
9. Self-Sacrifice and Service
Many of us were raised with the mindset that we do things for others—not because we expect something in return, but because it’s the right thing to do. Today, society often emphasizes personal gain over selflessness.
We can bring back the joy of serving others by including our grandchildren in acts of kindness—baking for a neighbor, volunteering, or writing letters to loved ones.
10. Forgiveness and Second Chances
Holding grudges has become easier than ever. In a world where people are quick to “cancel” others, forgiveness is often overlooked.
Family relationships are worth mending, and we can teach our grandchildren that people make mistakes, and second chances are important. By modeling forgiveness in our own lives, we can show them that love is stronger than pride.
Bringing These Values Back
It’s easy to say, “Things aren’t like they used to be.” But instead of mourning lost values, we can take action. We can embody the lessons we want to pass down and share them with love and patience.
Our role as grandmothers isn’t just to observe these changes—it’s to be the gentle guiding hands that remind our families what truly matters. If we don’t pass these values down, who will?
