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As grandmothers, we cherish the moments when our grandkids are small, needing our hugs, advice, and homemade cookies to brighten their days. But life is full of changes, and our grandchildren will go through many transitions as they grow. Some of these changes will be exciting, while others may be challenging, but one thing remains the same—our love and support can make all the difference.
Let’s talk about the big changes in a grandchild’s life that we, as grandmothers, should be ready for, so we can be a steady and loving presence through every stage.
1. Starting School
The first day of school is a huge milestone! Whether it’s preschool or kindergarten, our little ones are stepping into a brand-new world of learning and socializing. Some will be thrilled, while others may feel nervous. A grandma’s warm encouragement, a story about how we once started school too, or a special “first day of school” treat can help them feel brave and excited.
At this stage, children begin forming their first friendships, adapting to new routines, and experiencing independence for the first time. We can be there to hear about their day, help with homework, and remind them that learning is a lifelong adventure. Even a simple video call to check in can be a great comfort to a nervous school-aged grandchild.
2. Making Friends (and Losing Them)
Friendships change constantly when children are young. One day, they have a best friend, and the next, they’re heartbroken over a falling-out. Teaching them how to be kind, resilient, and open to new friendships will help them navigate these early social experiences. A grandma’s listening ear and comforting words can go a long way.
It’s also a good time to start introducing the concept of kindness and emotional intelligence. We can teach our grandkids how to handle conflicts in friendships and how to be good friends themselves. Helping them develop these skills will set them up for strong, healthy relationships in the future.
3. Moving to a New Home
Families relocate for many reasons, and moving can be especially tough on children. Leaving behind friends, schools, and familiar places can be overwhelming. A grandma’s role? Be the anchor. Send letters, video chat, or even visit if possible. Remind them that love isn’t bound by distance and that new adventures await them.
One way to help ease the transition is by making them a special scrapbook or memory book of their old home and encouraging them to start one for their new adventures. Letting them know that they are not alone in this experience can make a big difference.
4. Gaining a New Sibling
When a new baby arrives, it can stir up all kinds of emotions—excitement, jealousy, or even insecurity. Grandmothers can help their grandkids feel special during this transition. A little extra one-on-one time, a thoughtful gift, or simply reassuring them that they are still deeply loved can make all the difference.
Encouraging older siblings to take on a special “big brother” or “big sister” role can help them feel important rather than left out. Small acts, like reading to the baby together or letting them share their feelings openly, can help them adjust.
5. Starting Middle School
This is where things get tricky. Middle school brings new academic pressures, peer influences, and sometimes, self-doubt. As grandmothers, we can be a source of wisdom and encouragement. A little reassurance that everyone struggles at this stage and that they are growing into an amazing person can boost their confidence.
Middle school also comes with the first real experience of peer pressure. Kids may begin to test boundaries, and having a non-judgmental grandmother who listens can be an essential support system. We can remind them to be true to themselves, even when it feels difficult.
6. Changes in Interests and Hobbies
Our grandkids might go from loving dinosaurs to being obsessed with video games or suddenly deciding they want to play the violin. It’s all part of growing up! Even if we don’t understand every new phase, showing interest and cheering them on will help them feel supported.
Encouraging exploration and letting them know it’s okay to try different things will help them build confidence. Whether they are into painting, soccer, or coding, showing up for their events and supporting their passion will mean the world to them.
7. Teenage Years and High School
This is a time of self-discovery, independence, and sometimes rebellion. Peer pressure, romantic interests, academic stress—it’s all part of the teenage experience. Our role as grandmothers is to be a safe space. Even when they push us away, we should remind them we are always here, ready to listen without judgment.
It can be challenging when teenagers pull away, but knowing we are always there for them makes all the difference. Checking in, sending little notes of encouragement, or offering a judgment-free ear can go a long way in keeping our connection strong.
8. First Heartbreak
Whether it’s a lost friendship or a first love that didn’t work out, heartache is inevitable. It may be tempting to brush it off as just a phase, but to them, it feels like the end of the world. A grandma’s comfort, a little humor, and a reminder that time heals all wounds can help mend their broken hearts.
Being available to listen, share stories, and remind them of their worth will help them move forward stronger.
9. Learning to Drive
Nothing says “growing up” like getting behind the wheel. For us grandmothers, this stage can be nerve-wracking! But it’s also a chance to teach responsibility. Sharing a few old driving stories (maybe the time we ran over the neighbor’s mailbox) and reminding them to be careful can be a valuable part of their journey.
10. Graduation and Stepping Into Adulthood
Whether it’s high school or college, graduation is a time of celebration—and uncertainty. Our grandkids are stepping into the world, and they may feel overwhelmed. A grandma’s wisdom, encouragement, and maybe a little financial help (if we’re able) can give them the confidence to chase their dreams.
11. Moving Out and Becoming Independent
One day, they’ll pack their bags and leave home. It’s bittersweet, but it’s also a sign we’ve helped raise a strong, independent person. Keeping in touch through visits, calls, and little surprises in the mail will remind them that no matter where they go, they always have a loving grandma cheering them on.
12. Starting a Career
The working world is tough. Our grandkids will face job interviews, workplace challenges, and moments of doubt about their career choices. Sharing our own experiences about perseverance and resilience can give them perspective and encouragement as they navigate this stage.
Every stage of our grandchildren’s lives brings something new. As grandmothers, our job isn’t to stop the changes—it’s to be their steady, loving presence through them all. If we’re lucky, they’ll always know that no matter how big life gets, they can always come back to grandma for love, laughter, and maybe a warm plate of cookies.
