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As grandmothers, we know that warm hugs, sweet treats, and gentle words are some of the most treasured gifts we can offer our grandchildren. But something even more meaningful — something that often slips quietly under the surface — is how we ask about their lives.
You see, when we ask about the parts of their world that matter most to them, we’re telling them without words, “You are important to me. Your life matters. Your heart matters.”
And sometimes, they crave that attention and curiosity even more than they know how to say.
Here are 11 areas of their lives that our grandkids secretly love when we show real interest in — and some gentle ways to start those conversations.
1. Their Friendships
Friendships shape so much of who they are, even from a young age. Who they sit with at lunch, who they text after school, who makes them laugh — these connections mean the world to them.
When we ask, “Who’s your best friend these days?” or “Have you made any new friends lately?” we’re telling them we value the people they value. It gives them a chance to talk about loyalty, kindness, or even little heartaches if a friend has hurt them.
Friendship struggles are easier to face when you know someone you trust — like Grandma — is rooting for you.
2. Their Favorite Hobbies
Kids are natural creators and explorers. Whether it’s learning the guitar, building LEGO masterpieces, or getting lost in painting or writing, hobbies give them joy and purpose.
When we say, “Show me what you’ve been working on!” or “What’s your favorite thing to do after school?” we’re celebrating the unique talents and interests that make them who they are.
And even if we don’t fully understand their hobby (hello, confusing video games!), our willingness to listen and learn means the world.
3. Their Dreams and Future Plans
Children and teens dream big. They imagine careers as astronauts, teachers, athletes, fashion designers, or inventors of something the world hasn’t even thought of yet.
When we ask, “What’s something you hope to do one day?” or “If you could design your dream job, what would it be like?” we’re planting seeds of hope and confidence.
Our belief in their dreams — even the wildly ambitious ones — can stick with them for a lifetime.
4. Their Favorite Memories
Our grandchildren might only be eight, thirteen, or seventeen, but they’re already gathering memories they cherish. And they love being asked about them.
Try asking, “What’s one memory that always makes you smile?” or “What’s the funniest thing we’ve ever done together?” You might be surprised at what moments they hold closest.
Sometimes it’s not the fancy trips or big events they treasure — it’s the little things: the ice cream runs, the rainy days building puzzles, the way you always had bubble gum in your purse.
5. Their Opinions and Ideas
Grandkids feel respected and valued when someone older pauses to ask, “What do you think?” about something.
Whether it’s a movie you just watched together, a news story, or even a silly debate about the best pizza topping, asking their opinion teaches them that their thoughts matter.
It’s also a wonderful way to get to know how they see the world — which often surprises and delights us more than we expect.
6. Their Challenges
Life isn’t always easy, even in childhood. School pressures, friendship troubles, family changes — it can weigh heavily on little hearts.
When we ask gently, “Is anything making you feel a little stuck lately?” or “Is there anything you’d like me to pray about for you?” we’re opening the door for honesty and healing.
We don’t have to fix everything. Sometimes, just being the one who listens without judgment is the greatest gift.
7. Their Recent Achievements
Every small victory feels huge when you’re young. And kids often long for someone to notice and celebrate with them.
Asking, “What’s something you’re proud of this week?” invites them to share their wins — from acing a test, mastering a new skill, scoring a goal, or even just being brave when it was hard.
Our applause, whether whispered or shouted, echoes in their memories forever.
8. Their Favorite Books, Shows, and Music
The entertainment they love shapes how they think, laugh, and dream.
By asking, “What’s your favorite show or book right now?” or “Is there a song you think I should hear?” we’re stepping into their world — without judgment.
And when we really listen, it gives us endless chances to find common ground, share laughter, and sometimes even spot deeper conversations tucked inside the stories they love.
9. Their Pets (or Dream Pets)
Pets are family members to kids — sometimes their very best friends. Asking, “How’s your puppy doing?” or “If you could have any pet in the world, what would you choose?” can spark bright smiles and funny conversations.
Pets open a window into their tender hearts — and a glimpse into how deeply they love and care for others.
10. Their Favorite Foods and Treats
Asking about favorite foods may seem simple, but it’s really about something deeper: comfort, nostalgia, and love.
When we say, “If we could bake anything together this weekend, what would you pick?” or “What’s your dream meal?” it’s an invitation to create warm, tasty memories together.
Sometimes a homemade cookie and a chat about favorite desserts can lead to some of the most heartfelt talks.
11. The Little Things That Made Them Happy Today
One of the simplest but most magical questions we can ask is: “What’s something that made you smile today?”
It helps them focus on gratitude and joy — and it reminds them that even on hard days, good moments still exist.
Hearing their answers will often lift our spirits too. Maybe it was a joke from a friend, a kind teacher, a new toy, or even just seeing a rainbow. Whatever it is, it’s a chance to celebrate the sweetness in life.
A Final Thought
Our grandchildren need our love — but they also need our attention, our interest, and our presence.
When we ask about the things that matter to them, we are quietly building a bridge. A bridge strong enough to carry laughter, trust, tears, and triumphs across the years.
So let’s keep asking. Let’s keep listening.
Because every conversation we open is a door to their heart — and once we step inside, we’re building a bond that can last a lifetime and beyond.
After all, there’s no better place to be than tucked safely inside the heart of someone we love.
